What do you do with disappointment?

Back in February, Andy and I had the blessing of enjoying a trip to the Grove Park Inn. Before we left, we attended church with our families and heard a sermon, "A King's Heart." In the sermon on 2 Samuel 7, we were challenged by King David's response upon hearing that he would not be able to build the Lord's temple, but that his son would. He had a good, Godly desire to build this temple, but God's plan did not see that in His timing.We spent a lot of that night before we left talking about disappointment--what do you do with disappointment? While on our trip, one of our kitties had a stroke, likely due to some sort of trouble in his brain. Unknowingly, we came home refreshed and planning to slowly ease back to "real life," but instead, we faced the "real life" of getting in the car to take our old man cat to the vet for the last time... only to see my check-engine light was now on. Great timeliness for the sermon.

When God through Nathan, the prophet, told David no, this is where my heart would sag with self pity and begin to mold and stink on the kitchen counter. And no one wants a moldy sponge.

But instead of that selfish and smelly self-pity, David focused on what God did bless him with: God promised to establish his lineage and that the honor of building His temple would be passed on through Solomon, David's son (born from the somewhat notorious marriage with Bathsheba).

So is the answer the quintessential: "count your blessings"?

In the face of superficial disappointment, shifting covetous eyes to current joys might be the only cure needed.

But what about when the disappointment hits right to the marrow? or especially when the disappointment--for whatever your specific stories parameters require--must be kept secret, tucked away to the privacy of locked bathroom doors and tear-soaked pillow cases at night?

Then, in that very lonely then, it is hard to simply redirect your gaze from the crumpled tears to the riches. Those jewels and the gold look a little tarnished and chipped at this point. Sure, many times it's my sinful heart that has idolized this desire of mine to the point that nothing else looks as good--so it's a very raw type of repentance that my soul then needs, confessing that I've put my Dream on the throne where Christ should be.

but sometimes, there's a soul war raging because my Dream is a good dream. It's not selfish, it's not prideful, it wasn't envying. The Nathans in my life looked at my Dream and said it's good.

2 Samuel 7:1-3
1 Now when the king lived in his house and the Lord had given him rest from all his surrounding enemies, ² the king said to Nathan the prophet, “See now, I dwell in a house of cedar, but the ark of God dwells in a tent.” ³ And Nathan said to the king, “Go, do all that is in your heart, for the Lord is with you.”

I've sift my dream through God's Word and it still remains. It's good.

but. God chooses NO. (sometimes.)  and said that no is better than my "good."

 ⁴But that same night the word of the Lord came to Nathan, ⁵ “Go and tell my servant David, ‘Thus says the Lord: Would you build me a house to dwell in? ...¹² When your days are fulfilled and you lie down with your fathers, I will raise up your offspring after you, who shall come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom.¹³ He shall build a house for my name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever.

2 Samuel 7 goes on to share David's rejoice in this news. No, he will not build the temple. BUT, God's promises rang so richly through His "no." Promises of an enduring family line, promises that his son will be king, and more.

But what about the no that I hear? and that you hear? We, too, must listen for the promises in them. Here are the promises that I keep close (please consider commenting with yours?):

Psalm 84:11"No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly."

Luke 1:45"And blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfillment of what was spoken to her from the Lord.” 

2 Peter 1:3-4
^"3 His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, ⁴ by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire."

So when even the fear of disappointment is grabbing at my Dream, I run to these promises again. Then, in turn, it's easier to returning to counting blessings. It's easier to do the next thing. It's easier to wring out the souring self-pity in my heart. Is it actually easy? probably never.

Here's to praying and fasting hard for good Dreams and to trusting that He is faithful even when He says the "good" are not His good. May you join me in fighting for this faith, too.